In life, sometimes you need to bring your own sunshine.

I’m on a call with a friend, and she’s describing her career spanning decades. She’s humble, intelligent, and the kind of person who leaves you feeling better when you hang up, no matter how your day is going.

“I’m one of those people who loves whatever they do,” she said.

She’s energetic; her face displays a genuine smile – even when she is not speaking. You cannot help but feel the positive, can-do energy she projects.

And listening to her, I realize she’s not talking exclusively about her work life.

Grandchildren, a son in the military, or unexpectedly being handed the reins of a multimillion-dollar operation to fix – each topic is bathed in a warm, optimistic attitude.

Bringing our own sunshine doesn’t mean pretending the hard stuff isn’t hard.

When I was a kid and feeling sorry for myself, my mom would spout a familiar line from the parental handbook: “Stop being a Sad Sack and feeling sorry for yourself.” That was my cue to stop moping around the house and get on with things.

Later I’d learn Sad Sack was a term for people who seemed to carry a dark cloud over them, always accepting their circumstances as permanent. If there was a default switch between good and bad, the latter was glued in place. This week I read where a writer pegged these people as unable to love a sunset and pizza.

There is a lot of truth in the idea that your attitude can become self-fulfilling. Doubt and confidence are competing forces, always fighting for control of our actions. Bringing the sunshine helps keep the darkness from overstaying its welcome and getting in the way of life’s opportunities.

Doubt can be part of our instinct to protect ourselves. But we can learn to question it, to keep the dark clouds from closing in and overtaking our emotions.

So, we bring the sunshine.

Bringing the sunshine doesn’t mean being overly optimistic or annoyingly Pollyannaish. But recognizing that our attitude can influence outcomes is a game-changer. We can change the world around us, but we need the courage to bring our own sunshine and push back against creeping negativity.

Research offers some support for bringing the sunshine.

Studies have linked optimism with longer lives. A sunny disposition is no guarantee, but it can encourage choices that serve us well.

True sunshine warms not only you, but those around you.

Granted, we can’t control everything happening to us in life, but we can choose how we respond. My friend probably wasn’t trying to brighten my day. She simply brought her own sunshine – and left a little behind.

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